It was just like a scene in an intrigue film
and iand'm still not convinced that it wasnand't for real
This isnand't intended for me, i donand't think.
itand's a missive from the edge of despair, i mean brink
of total desperation; the communication therein
says her hopes for survival are slim
and sheand's writing to the front, though weand've yet to meet,
with a confidential matter cause sheand's heard iand'm discreet.
and the urgency of her request for my aid
is matched by the depth of the trust she displayed.
andquot;donand't betray me like our oil minister did, staged a coup
and iand'm about to flee nigeria soon
but iand'll never make it out,andquot; she says, with twenty million
three hundred twenty thousand us dollars that are still in
her possession. she embezzled them, i guess.
look, i donand't really know her so uh... thatand's none of my business.
sheand's the lady maryam abacha, deposed.
these days canand't even get her caps-lock key unfroze
but yo, something and'bout a widow in distress
(with 20 million dollars hidden in a metal chest)
softened up the frontalotand's heart no doubt
so i hit the reply button, tell her i can help her out.
She writes me back: dear frontalot, united states...
she acts so thankful. a bank full of money awaits!
and i hate delays so iand'm quick to turn around
with my full name and the number to my checking account
and the scan of my license to drive an automobile
and my passport number proving frontalotand's for real!
then iand'll meet the money in stockholm, ainand't gonna walk home,
think iand'll retire to the south of spain and sip gazpacho.
not so quick, thereand's a little problem.
lady a apparently had difficulty running all them
numbers i give her, but look, the fake idand's my only one
and thatand's a real passport, i got it off usenet and checked,
iand'm not dumb. iand'm not some idiot
whoand's about to lose your money for you, quicker than iand'm getting it
and of course my bank balance is negative, whose isnand't?
thatand's why i need your 20% money laundering commission.
and iand'm wishing i could talk about this further with you but i canand't.
i just got an email from dr. ubugu of chad.
heand's got a hundred and seventy-seven million in a bag.
i feel i got to help him and'cause his story is so sad.
It was just like a scene in an intrigue film
and iand'm still not convinced that it wasnand't for real
