STAN
Chorus:
My teaīs gone cold Iīm wondering why I..
Got out of bed at all
The morning rain clouds up my window..
And I canīt see at all
And even if I could itīll all be gray,
But your picture on my wall
It reminds me, that itīs not so bad,
Itīs not so bad..
Dear Slim, I wrote but you still ainīt callin
I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom
I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got īem
There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin
Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot īem
but anyways; fuck it, whatīs been up? Man howīs your daughter?
My girlfriendīs pregnant too, Iīm bout to be a father
If I have a daughter, guess what Iīma call her?
Iīma name her Bonnie
I read about your Uncle Ronnie too Iīm sorry
I had a friend kill himself over some bitch who didnīt want him
I know you probably hear this everyday, but Iīm your biggest fan
I even got the underground shit that you did with Skam
I got a room full of your posters and your pictures man
I like the shit you did with Rawkus too, that shit was fat
Anyways, I hope you get this man, hit me back,
just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan
This is Stan
Chorus
Dear Slim, you still ainīt called or wrote, I hope you have a chance
I ainīt mad - I just think itīs FUCKED UP you donīt answer fans
If you didnīt wanna talk to me outside your concert
you didnīt have to, but you coulda signed an autograph for Matthew
Thatīs my little brother man, heīs only six years old
We waited in the blistering cold for you,
Four hours and you just said, "No."
Thatīs pretty shitty man - youīre like his fuckin idol
He wants to be just like you man, he likes you more than I do
I ainīt that mad though, I just donīt like bein lied to
Remember when we met in Denver - you said if Iīd write you
you would write back - see Iīm just like you in a way
I never knew my father neither;
He used to always cheat on my mom and beat her
I can relate to what youīre saying in your songs
so when I have a shitty day, I drift away and put īem on
cause I donīt really got shit else so that shit helps when Iīm depressed
I even got a tattoo of your name across the chest
Sometimes I even cut myself to see how much it bleeds
Itīs like adrenaline, the pain is such a sudden rush for me
See everything you say is real, and I respect you cause you tell it
My girlfriendīs jealous cause I talk about you 24/7
But she donīt know you like I know you Slim, no one does
She donīt know what it was like for people like us growin up
You gotta call me man, Iīll be the biggest fan youīll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Stan -- P.S. We should be together too
Chorus
Dear Mister-Iīm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
thisīll be the last package I ever send your ass
Itīs been six months and still no word - I donīt deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on īem perfect
So this is my cassette Iīm sending you, I hope you hear it
Iīm in the car right now, Iīm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air Tonight"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didnīt, then Phil saw it all, then at a a show he found him?
Thatīs kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now itīs too late - Iīm on a 1000 downers now, Iīm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped ALL of your pictures off the wall
I love you Slim, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you canīt sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you canīt sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you canīt BREATHE without me
See Slim; {*screaming*}
Shut up bitch! Iīm tryin to talk!
Hey Slim, thatīs my girlfriend screamin in the trunk
but I didnīt slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ainīt like you
cause if she suffocates sheīll suffer more, and then sheīll die too
Well, gotta go, Iīm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, howīm I supposed to send this shit out?
Chorus
Dear Stan, I meant to write you sooner but I just been busy
You said your girlfriendīs pregnant now, how far along is she?
Look, Iīm really flattered you would call your daughter that
and hereīs an autograph for your brother,
I wrote it on the Starter cap
Iīm sorry I didnīt see you at the show, I musta missed you
Donīt think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But whatīs this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit just clownin dogg,
Cīmon - how fucked up is you?
You got some issues Stan, I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when you get down some
And whatīs this shit about us meant to be together?
That type of shitīll make me not want us to meet each other
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself, I think that youīll be doin just fine
if you relax a little, Iīm glad I inspire you but Stan
why are you so mad? Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
I just donīt want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
and had his girlfriend in the trunk, and she was pregnant with his kid
and in the car they found a tape, but they didnīt say who it was to
Come to think about, his name was.. it was you
Damn
